Why must everything go around money?

I’m totally aware how stupid is this question or is it really?

I’m pretty sure that many people are asking the same question each day. To be honest I have no idea where I’m going with this blog post. I just needed to get everything off my chest. Before I get more into detail I wanna clear some things… I’m not writing this so you all could feel sorry nor do I do it to seek your help.

I’m doing this because I want to get everything off of my chest. I’m doing this because I want to make people notice and to make them understand that there’s more than they see and there’s way more than they think there is, always…

And now I don’t know what to say anymore… Well… I know, but I’m not sure I wanna share and whether I should share. Being that open can also be the death of me one day.

I shall try to write something but I’m not gonna promise anything that would make sense…

I’m just tired of being influenced by money. Hiding from people because you know your parents don’t have enough money in order to let you go out with friends. Of course they give me the amount I need if I do want to go but if you know this is the only money the whole family has for the month you’re not that excited to go anywhere. The same with school to be honest. I just hope that none of the teachers assigns something where you have to spend money…

It has started to influence so many things. In the morning mum fussed with me for not doing the research on schools and few hours later she says that she has no idea whether we have the money to continue to pay for my education and since school education here is compulsory until 16 (they’re trying to change it to 18 but for us it would still be 16) so adios for me… Of course I don’t have the motivation to do research on schools if I know it’s useless…

Many of you would probably ask “why don’t you search help from the government and ask for some money?” There’s no point, more money will be spent on the paperwork than the money you get from the government…

I usually wouldn’t complain but it’s growing more and more onto me. It’s just stressing me out and I don’t really wanna talk about it but I need to let it out of myself. I know I could go to work but no one wants an uneducated kid who just finished middle school… I just don’t know what to do anymore and I try not to let it influence me or let others see my pain and sufferings and the stress it causes me because I don’t want others to know but it is how it is and I don’t have many choices besides hope.

Ann…

Advertisements