So I’m going to explain myself once more on the same topic.

Every time I start writing this post about my recent confusions I have my thoughts clear and ready to be written down. Here’s a plot twist to you, once I actually start writing it’s all gone. I think you can see where the problem lies.

I guess it all comes down to me finally realising what some people mean to me and to some things I feel more sad then I probably should. I’m pretty sure that once I realise who is who and who means what to me that I shall be fine.

I mean I had my ex and we were together for a year and then my new boyfriend who we’ve been together for almost 2 months but have I seen any difference? Have I noticed something in my own life?

I actually have and I’m not sure if all of them are so positive. Some of the problems were actually brought out by Karl so he sees those problems too. Meaning something needs to be changed.

I often joke around saying that I’m an independent black woman and that I don’t need any help, which is true for the most part. What I do miss though is something else. I’m noticing that the more I spend time with him the less of a “woman” I am and that  kind of scares me. I think what is happening is something I have been scared about for a really long time.

I guess I just need a break to think about stuff and I think that Christmas will be a good time for that. I need to come up with a plan and I need to organise my life because I don’t want to end up like my mum and my nan did.

I hope this doesn’t hurt anyone reading and if it does I’m happy to discuss on it more.

Have one more song for the post. I hope I get round to writing to the book review soon enough.

Ann :3

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